Spanking Chart and Peaks & Troughs...

I came across these two charts while reading an old post on the 'Evolving Your Man' blog and thought someone might find them useful...

I do like that blog, but I sometimes come away from reading it slightly depressed. I get that the whole point of the blog (now at any rate, I'm not sure it always was) is promoting the idea of women taking a lover and making their locked husband's into cuckolds, but what really depresses me about it is that I can't honestly argue with a lot of the things she writes.

Love Is A Choice But Attraction Is Not: It Is Time For You To Reignite Desire And Intimacy

Not that I am fearful of Mistress taking a lover, but at the same time I never want her to feel taken for granted or that our marriage is 'functional'. I also never want her to feel that my attraction to her has diminished, ever! It is something that I feel incredibly strongly about. Perhaps too strongly sometimes. 

Yesterday I felt quite emotional for some reason (and this was before I read this article), but that has kind of just reignited it all over again. Of course I could just decide to not read this blog, but no, I'd rather feel too much sometimes than stick my head in the sand.

As Mistress and I discussed yesterday, there are peaks and troughs in any relationship, and thankfully our troughs are fairly shallow. We have very little to worry about, we own our own home, we have no children to fret over or provide for (probably a big part of where marriages can become functional if I'm honest), we are both employed, we are both fairly healthy, etc etc. 

We both hate the hot weather so that is an issue at the moment, and we feel limited in what we can do together when it's 28 fucking degrees again at the weekend. We'd love to go out somewhere and be together looking round an old house or something, but it's tough this year. And sleeping apart sucks too. But then the other night it was a bit cooler and I almost suggested we try it, but then in the morning it was clear that Mistress had slept very badly so one of us would have ended up in the spare room anyway.

The thing is... I do sometimes just feel so in love with her, like a teenager with his first girlfriend, quite honestly. I want to touch her all the time, to the point where I feel like I'm being annoying, but I can't help it. And I love that I can still feel that way, but at the same time I feel kind of silly. Like I 'shouldn't' feel that way, not at 56 and 34 years into a relationship. 

I try to tell myself, no, it's not you that's wrong. It's wonderful that you still feel this way. Think of all the women in the world who's husbands barely acknowledge them, let alone try to make them feel desired or loved. Which I realise makes me sound like a massive self-congratulatory prick if you take it that way, but that's really not how I meant it.

I still look at her just the same as when we first met. She is so damned sexy. I know very few people ever really believe they are as hot as others see them and it's a real shame. Regardless I feel compelled to try to convince her day after day. I truly want her to feel sexy and powerful, because that's how I see her. Just knowing what she could make me do if she really wanted to leaves me feeling quite... heady! 

Honestly all I ever wanted when I was a teenager was to find my 'person', be with them forever and make them feel completely safe and loved. That didn't work out with my first girlfriend for many reasons, but also (in hindsight) I'm pretty sure she wasn't over her previous boyfriend. Despite that initial failure I never really wanted to 'bang chicks', I wanted a special bond with someone truly worth it and I am so thankful that in the end I got exactly what I wanted (and it only took two goes!).

Oh and in case you're wondering, I genuinely don't feel like I missed out on 'sowing my oats' as they say. I think I was way too scared of getting a girl pregnant to go around dispensing my jizz left right and centre (even if there had been a queue of willing receptacles - which I certainly don't recall there being!), and since I've never really drunk much either I was never really the type to throw caution to the wind. I may have regrets about the past but that isn't one of them.

It never occurred to me at the time that forming a deep bond like that was probably the best way to lay the foundation for the kind of sex life I would later crave. Not that I wanted a 'Femdom' life when I was 22 years old, I was happy to have hot vanilla sex, doing the kind of things you do when you're young - banging all night and going to work on two hours sleep. It was great. I wouldn't swap it for what we have now though, honestly.

I wasn't ignorant about Femdom, even then though, I remember seeing some 'German' porn on VHS when I was 15 or 16 and I liked it a lot. I just didn't think that was something people did in real life. It took me several years to bring this idea up to Mistress and after some initial hesitation she was okay with it. It was very much restricted to occasional 'sessions' though and the rest of the time we were pretty much vanilla.

I haven't had masses of male friends over my lifetime, partly because I've been working in the same company since I was sixteen, but the people I have come into contact with just confuse me, honestly. I may have mentioned this before but I was friends with a guy for many years who was very successful in business and kept himself in great shape, but his attitude to his wife sucked. Like I can't remember exactly what it was but for some reason his wife thought she needed to go to an ER (I think she had an eye infection or something) and she was hoping he would drive her there, and he didn't really want to. That wasn't the only memorable instance of his inattention either

And my other friend, who is also my business partner now, he has a wife and three children (he's about ten years younger than me) but even years ago it just sounded like they were already 'functional' (as that post puts it). Sometimes I just want to slap him hard and say 'what are you doing?' Yes it takes two to make a good marriage, but make a fucking effort. But of course I can't. It's not my place to meddle in other people's lives and maybe they are happy co-existing without any deep feelings.    

It just confuses me. That's all. This person is supposed to be everything to you, but you don't want to drive them to the ER? Like, are you for real? Mistress would NEVER have to ask me to drive her to the ER, or anywhere. I would want to. I don't want her sitting in a waiting room for hours on her own, what am I gonna do while she's there? Go fishing? No, I'm going to be worrying about her. 

Is it me? I don't understand other men. I'm sure there must be lots of decent, intelligent men out there who think the same way as me, but I don't think I've ever met any. Perhaps I should be charitable and think they just don't like to appear that way outwardly, because maybe they think it makes them look 'weak' or something. I don't know.

Whatever, I know I can't solve the rest of the world's problems and I shouldn't worry about it. But I can't help but wonder if the first answer to that blogpost isn't 'take a lover to make you feel desired again', shouldn't be 'men wake the fuck up and do something!', is it that hard, really? Surely the bar is so low that even the smallest effort would be noticed? 

Sorry, I didn't mean to bore on about this so long, it just frustrates and annoys me. And I hate that I feel silly because I adore my wonderful Mistress and I want her to feel it every day. 

Thank God for Mistress Scarlet's blog, who posts regularly and usually puts a smile on my face. 

Her latest post 'Tease and denial is so easy, yet DEVASTATING for the enduringly denied male' is short but sweet. I just love how much she enjoys being cruel and heartless to her husband, if Mistress could feel just a tiny fraction of that I would be so happy. 😊

*****

I wrote this post on Monday, but I delayed posting it because Mistress was stressing about potentially having a shitty week at work this week and I didn't want her to read this while that was still going on.

In the meantime Literotica have continued to publish my story and the comments have started to become more mixed. I'm surprised it took this long honestly, but as the story has developed and become more 'extreme' so the scores have tapered off a bit and the reactions more mixed.

It makes me second guess my decision to keep pushing the story further and further, especially knowing what's still to come. It also reminds me of Mistress's somewhat negative reaction to the story when she proof read it for me. And I'm left feeling that maybe I have been a bit too open and unguarded when exposing my inner thoughts. Especially when you get comments like this one;

Sissyjackie2008 (on the 13th Aug 2026)

"This story reminds me of the first time I sucked a cock in front of my wife. The emasculation was so humiliating, but erotic as she watched in amusement."

No disrespect to Sissyjackie2008, but it does make you wonder what the actual fuck I wrote and whether I should just keep the crazy shit inside my head inside my head? 

I feel like I have retreated into my shell a bit the last few days too, which leaves me feeling a little deflated. On the one hand I want to be open and honest with Mistress about everything because she is my everything, but I can't help feeling that deep down maybe she would prefer it if I didn't.

Three Things (Written August 2026)

It was a few days before my 40th birthday and my gorgeous wife Leigha told me she wanted to do something really special for me this year.

“I want you to write down three naughty things you’ve always wanted me to do…” she said. “…and I will make two of them come true’.

I must admit I was a bit taken aback by this as I have always been more, ahem… ‘adventurous’ in bed than Leigha and, not wanting to get my hopes up and be disappointed I asked her rather sceptically ‘are you sure?’

She smiled at me and slid down the bed, wrapped her lips around my cock then sucked and stroked me hard until I erupted all over my stomach.

I tentatively asked her again the next day, but she was adamant. Even so, when I finally gave her the piece of paper a couple of days later (folded up so she couldn’t see what I’d written) I checked a third time. She didn’t seem quite so adamant now, possibly realising that there was more than one thing I might come up with that she might find a little distasteful. 

But she was unwilling to back down and now it was too late to set any boundaries, I’d already chosen what I’d chosen and if I had to change it now it would feel really shitty. But we both knew that there was going to be at least one thing on that list that she didn’t want to do, because I’d tried before. Many times.

When I first handed over my list she asked me what had taken me so long?

Well, see there were many things that I ‘could’ have put on that list, but I knew this was my one chance to make at least one of my fantasies come true, so I thought it over long and hard and eventually came to the conclusion that, okay if I put that one thing down that I knew she wouldn’t want to do, then clearly she ‘had’ to do the other two. Right?

Even so, my heart was beating hard as I left the piece of paper with her and went about my day.

Leigha didn’t say a word, but I definitely detected a shift in her demeanour during the course of the day and I wondered if she was regretting getting herself into this position? Which of course made me feel kind of bad, because now that I’d had time to think about it maybe it was a bit pig-headed of me to choose what I did. Then again, she suggested it and it was supposed to be my birthday treat! Gah!

A Wonderful Sunday Treat for Me!

Earlier today Mistress and I spent a little time in bed together, which was quite wonderful from my perspective. Mistress had a lovely orgasm on my tongue and then just as I was expecting to worship her feet a little bit she got up and told me to move down the bed and get on my knees on the carpet. She moved to the edge of the bed and I took great pleasure in licking and sucking Mistress's delicious pussy clean. 

Once I had done that Mistress got off the bed and told me to put the 'bed back'. What she meant by that was to move the pillows back to their normal positions, rather then piled up so she could lean back against them. Once I had done that I was about to ask Mistress if I could be unlocked when she told me 'You are unlocked and you can choose a cock ring'.

I grabbed the basic Exact-fit ring and slipped it on and then got on the bed. Mistress got on too and instead of laying down next to me as she usually did she knelt upright, leaning forward to kiss me as she started playing with my cock. 

Almost immediately she stood up and stood over me, facing my feet. My hands drifted up the backs of her gorgeous legs and parted her ass cheeks slightly. I begged Mistress to allow me to worship her delicious ass and she said I needed to beg louder if I wanted it.

I begged louder and Mistress soon sank down, my cock getting harder as my tongue touched her ass. Mistress pumped my cock and slapped my balls hard, it was wonderful. Mistress kept slapping and stroking, making me beg twice more for what I wanted so badly.

Alas, after third time she got off me and stroked me to the edge, stopping when I got there and laying down next to me. I thought that was it but Mistress reached down and teased my cock so gently, it was maddening (but I loved it of course) and then she started stroking me hard again, digging her nails in and slapping my balls some more.

Once I edged a second time she told me I was locked back up. I was just over the moon that I got to worship her incredible ass, honestly and told her so. We cuddled for a little while and then she got up on her knees, she looked amazing and I asked if I could be allowed to see her gorgeous breasts. I know I have a very quiet voice, and Mistress must have misheard me because the next thing I know she got off the bed and stood by it waiting for me to kiss her ass.

I was a little confused but I wasn't going to pass up the opportunity to kiss Mistress's amazing ass, so that was a nice little unexpected treat, even if I didn't get to see her beautiful breasts! Maybe next time?

Later I remarked that I didn't get to worship her pretty feet, so Mistress had me do it downstairs while we were watching TV together, that was a nice treat too. Her feet are so fucking sexy, I love them so, so much. But you know that already.

*****

I've just finished another short little story, which I will probably post here soon. I don't have a title for it as yet, could be 'Three Things', could be 'Birthday Treat'... maybe something completely different. It's nothing 'spectacular' but I kinda like it. It's a little different.

Not IMHO Your Best Work...!

The 7th part of 'HTBYM' has been published on Literotica this morning and within the first hour I received this comment:

billy2002 has commented on your story How to Break Your Man Pt. 07

“The Dean part of the chapter was not, IMHO, your best work. It seemed to be, let’s just get rid of Dean quick. I loved that Amy reconnected 😂 with Rick. I hope the next guy Amy finds is more the man she and Rick need.”

I actually agree with this to a degree, I think the second half of the story does feel a little rushed and the last couple of chapters even more so. But I thought that even when I was writing it and I tried to slow it down, but I couldn't really work out how to do it without just filling it with padding that people would want to skip, especially on repeat reads.

It's difficult because at the start there's so much to say, but once things get rolling the focus changes. It becomes more about 'what happens' rather than the tension between Amy and Rick we see at the start. So yeah, I get it and I would totally understand if someone told me they like the earlier chapters better. 

There's also this feeling when I am writing big stories, that I want to get it finished before it ends up being filed away in the 'Story Ideas' folder for years! Anyway, I'm still pretty happy with it, and nobody's 'paying' to read it. 

Funnily enough when I was getting close to finishing this I did wonder about maybe getting it published by Femdom Cave or something (if that still exists) or self-publishing it through Amazon or something. But then I thought, okay, let's say some people buy it, how much money is that actually going to generate? Not a huge amount, but probably enough that I would need to declare it for tax purposes.

Do I really want the aggro of explaining where £200-300 came from? Do I really want to have to fill in tax forms every year because I have this random income? No. So I decided to just put it on Literotica. After all, I'm not doing this for money, my only concern is that at some point some asshole uses my text to create a 'product', I've already noticed some authors complaining about this on Literotica, but I really don't know what can possibly be done about that. In a way it's flattering, but still very annoying I'm sure.

At the moment, all the parts except 'Part 5' have 'HOT' ratings, which is great! The only thing is that as yet it doesn't appear on my author page, I assume this is because it is only partly published. If you view the page as 'Newest First' it's not there at all, but if you change it to 'alphabetical' order then the first part is there.

It's so long since I published a multi-part story like this all in one go that I can't really remember how it works. Anyway, I'm sure they know that they are doing.

Literotica is Halfway Through Publishing 'How to Break Your Man'

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Comments.

I do not know what is going on with the comments. I am not getting comment notifications anymore and I've noticed that some comments are showing up for me but they aren't being published, but nor is Google asking me to approve them. I don't get it. 

I also noticed that there were several comments that people left which were marked as spam for no reason and were never published. Some of these go back a couple of years, so I can only apologise if you left a comment and it never appeared on the blog.

Do We Need a Safeword?

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The One and Only Silver Lining of this Bloody Weather!

As much as Mistress and I detest the summer heat and we really do detest it (not least because we've been sleeping in separate beds for weeks now, which increases the chance of a good night's sleep but also takes away any chance of late night teasing 😭), if there's one positive, one silver lining I can point to then it's the enormous amount of time I've been able to spend with Mistress's beautiful naked feet in my lap. 

Evening after evening after evening I've spent gently rubbing those insanely sexy feet and it doesn't seem to matter how long this goes on the effect just doesn't seem to wear off. I still feel completely intoxicated by them and I spent a wonderful 90m last night loving every second. I'm sure this isn't normal, but honestly I don't really care.

I know Mistress has noticed the surprising effect her feet have on me. Several times she's commented on something on the TV and realised that I haven't really been paying attention because my mind is focused on her silky instep or her pretty toes. One time she even took her feet away so that I would pay attention to what we were supposed to be watching. She really did! 

Absolute perfection!

And you know, just writing this and thinking about her beautiful, petite feet (UK 4) now is making me feel light headed. What the hell is wrong with me? I'm thankful I have this place to share my weirdness, cos I know you guys won't judge me like 'normal' people would. Sigh... 

Speaking of my foot fetish, I reread my story 'Selection Day' the other day and really enjoyed it. I'm very pleased with that one and would like to continue it. This is something I said to Mistress the other day, I need to stop focusing on new stories and continue ones that I've already started so that I don't end up writing more 'first chapters'. Obviously some ideas need a stand alone story, but there are so many already that could be continued, not least 'Girls Talk' which is screaming to be expanded.

Perhaps my writing switch hasn't turned itself just yet as after a couple of days respite following the completion of 'How to Break Your Man' my brain seems to be buzzing with filth again... and I was driving around this morning formulating dialogue for 'Selection Day Part 2', I think that may have to be written very soon! 

Literotica have now published the first four chapters of 'H.T.B.Y.M.' and so far the reaction has been good. I did notice that this morning that Part 4 had just been published and had received one vote (1/5) which is a bit uncalled for. I don't think I've ever given a story a 1/5, it would have to be tremendously bad and poorly written for me to do that, but okay, never mind.. it's up to 4.36/5 now, with 25 votes from 1100 views. 

The other three parts are all sitting way over the 4.5 score necessary to get a 'HOT' badge, and there's also been several nice comments. Actually there hasn't been a single negative comment yet although this one from 'Buster2U' (a regular commenter) is a little confusing...

"10 Big Blazing Stars for this author, Robert, for writing this excellent story. Why would ANY man want to be hurt and humiliated like this??? I only know that when wife #4 was fucking every BBC she could find in San Jose, it hurt me so bad that I hated myself. I wasn't good enough to keep her happy. But is that the way it always works??? This poor guy needs to snap out of his suicidal state before it is too late. Great writing. Thanks, Buster2U"

But that's not unusual, Buster2Us comments are often a little hard to fathom!

One commenter said they really wanted to see the videos I described in the story, and it occurred to me that maybe people don't realise that these are actually real videos. Perhaps they will later because I name more specific film studios (Femdom Empire) and actresses, but the first three videos are more obscure.

I don't want to link to them here, because that's a sure fire way to incur the wrath of the Blogger bots, so I will just say if you want to find them, it's not that difficult, just Google the name of the video (in the story) with the author 'SubNation' and also 'Hypnotube' (the site where they are primarily located, though I'm sure they are probably available elsewhere too).

Watch at your own risk! You don't want to end up like Rick. Or maybe you do....?