My absolute favourite TV show right now is called ‘First Dates’, it’s on its third series here in the UK and last night’s episode was a belter. For those who haven’t seen it, or for those who don’t live here and presumably aren’t able to see it, the idea is simple. There’s a nice restaurant in London, where loads of couples who are matched up via the Channel 4 website, meet for the very first time and go on blind dates together. The TV company films it all and shows us the best ones.
It is endlessly entertaining and at times hilariously funny. Last night a guy explained that his mother was half-Egyptian, at which his date looked confused and said ‘I didn’t know you could be Egyptian…’, like Egypt only existed thousands of years ago…? Later she was filmed in the bathroom moaning into her phone that ‘He isn’t even wearing a Rolex’.
But it was another couple who raised the question above. There was a girl and a big guy who had quite a lot of tattoos, and they seemed to be getting on well until he dropped into the conversation that he had made porn films. At which point she pretty much freaked out and disappeared to the bathroom herself. When she returned the situation quickly deteriorated and it was clear that this was not going to go any further.
After the show finished Mistress R asked me if it would bother me, to which I replied that, actually I had never really given it any thought. It’s a long, long time since I was single for one thing… but this got me thinking about this subject and I asked my friend at work for his opinions too. We mulled it over for most of the day, and decided that it would depend on a lot of things, but assuming all things to be equal and that you meet someone who you are attracted to, would it actually be any different from them having slept with loads of people and not getting filmed/paid for it?
In the case of this guy (and, let’s be honest most ‘guys’ in porn) if he hadn’t told her then she probably wouldn’t have known. Of course, other people might tell her, what I meant was it’s not like he was likely to be recognized in the street in the same way that, say Sacha Grey might be. In any case, if he had kept it to himself for a while at least, he might have had a chance to build a relationship with the woman first before revealing something which is obviously potentially quite contentious. True, she’s bound to say ‘Why didn’t you tell me this before… and what else aren’t you telling me?’, but the obvious answer to that is I wanted you to get to know me first, so you wouldn’t judge me unfairly.
Actually, in this instance, the main issue seemed not to be that he’d been filmed and that his porn stardom was an issue or likely embarrassment waiting to happen (funnily enough the woman had worked in a sex shop), but more that she felt like she couldn’t compete with the women he’d slept with because they must be young and have perfect porn bodies…
To be fair, if I was single and a *retired* Bobbi Starr or Ashley Fires wanted me to date them, would I feel secure enough about myself, when all it would take would be ten seconds and a Google search to find video of either of them being thoroughly pleasuredby guys with stupidly big cocks (on the plus side, both of those women have made Femdom / Chastity / Cuckold porn too :)).
Honestly I think it would come down to a lot of factors, not least of which would be their attitude and personality. I certainly don’t think I would dismiss someone out of hand if they told me they had done porn, but I might if I thought it had negatively affected their attitude towards men, and more specifically their attitude towards sex within a normal relationship.
I’m not sure if Mistress R answered her own question or not, if she did I can’t remember what she said. Thankfully it’s not something either of us are likely to have to consider, but it is an interesting question and I would be interested to hear what my readers think?
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