As I was driving to work this morning my mind drifted back to yesterday and my accidental ruined orgasm and more specifically the immediate punishment Mistress meted out for it. I kinda skated over it in my previous post, but I think it's worthy of a little more comment.
It really took me by surprise apart from anything else, I mean I knew I would be punished for it, but I naturally assumed that would be done with the whip and the paddle, and more than likely the next time we had sex (though Mistress has sometimes punished me for accidental ruins on the spot now I think about it).
As I said, it's not unusual for Mistress to whip my balls with the cock whip, but this was much more severe than usual. In fact it was bloody painful and I squirmed and cursed quite a bit as Mistress was delivering my punishment, not least because all ten strokes seemed to land primarily on my left ball!
But fair enough, it was a punishment and I deserved it, and I did tell Mistress I wanted her to be meaner so I can't really complain. And yeah, it hurt when she was doing it, but a couple of minutes later it was fine and honestly I loved that she did it. When I was remembering it this morning I started to get hard just thinking about it, and it made me think about what I said the other day about the 'way' things are done being important and how something can be 'hot' or 'not' depending on the way it's delivered.
Because, I do not enjoy pain, for the sake of pain. And I did not enjoy that punishment at all while it was happening, but I absolutely loved that she did it and that she was decisive and just did it, without hesitation or mercy, which made it a hot memory for me. It will certainly make me a little more cautious about getting too close the the edge for a little while!
I also mentioned Mistress's voice in my last post (or the one before). Mistress has an amazingly sexy voice when she wants to. She is quite well spoken anyway and when she turns it up to 'Mistress' mode it's absolutely incredible. I love the way she talks to me in bed, teasing and taunting me as she tortures and teases my cock and balls, it's truly amazing.
I feel like Mistress is definitely responding to my request to be meaner towards me, perhaps more obviously on the physical side (harder punishments and rougher teasing), but also on the verbal side. I understand why she might be more cautious about that, but it's definitely moving in the right direction which is such a wonderful feeling.
It's so hard trying to explain to someone what you mean when you say 'I want you to be meaner to me', because the natural assumption is, you know, don't hold back with the punishments or whatever, but that's too simplistic and there's so many other ways to be 'mean'. And it's hard to explain them without using words with negative connotations like 'selfish', because on element of this is for her to be more 'selfish' sexually (for example, use my tongue but then don't unlock me).
And then there's the more 'creative' ways she could be mean, like slapping my balls when I'm cumming, or telling me to cum and then letting go when I get to the edge (I don't mean ruining me - though that's always an option of course, I mean just letting go and stopping so I don't get any kind of release even though she told me she was going to let me).
Not always letting me see her breasts is one she's already deploying very effectively, but really anything where she gives with one hand and takes with the other fits the bill nicely. Like she could offer to let me cum, but tell me if I want it then there's some other penalty, or tell me if she lets me worship her ass she won't unlock me again for at least a week or something like that.
Trying to explain how to be meaner 'verbally' is very difficult, because a lot of it is in the delivery and not necessarily the words that are spoken. But also because you can't really give a proscriptive list of things that are okay and not okay, I think it's just a case of sucking it and see how it lands (and as Mistress said) telling her if she goes a little too far.
As I said before, I am not too worried about that because I think Mistress upper level of what she'd be comfortable saying would be less than where I'd draw the line (as we kind of saw with my last story). But still I appreciate that this will likely be a gradual thing as she becomes more comfortable.
Finally, before I go, I wanted to tell you about the canvas we have up over our stairs. It is a picture I took of my beautiful Mistress some time ago. I wish I could post it here, but for obvious reasons I can't. She is wearing a basque and looking over her shoulder directly at the camera.
The picture was taken against a red wall in our bedroom and I over exposed the picture to make it look 'arty'. Considering I really had no idea what I was doing it came out spectacularly well, but the thing that makes the picture absolutely amazing is the expression on Mistress's face. She looks truly magnificent, dominant and downright formidable. I love that picture so much. It's been up for years and I would never ever want to take it down.
It's funny because occasionally we have people come to the house to fix things, plumbers etc and I sometimes wonder what they make of it. Mistress did say that one 'workman' did comment on it once, but I can't remember exactly what he said. I think it was slightly 'inappropriate' but Mistress took it as a compliment.
No comments:
Post a Comment