So last night I woke up really early and then went back to sleep and had a really shitty dream where Mistress and I had a huge argument about, well... her feeling neglected because of Chastity and more particularly me 'not wanting' to have penetrative sex with her. Which is rubbish of course, I never said I didn't want to have penetrative sex with her, she imposed the rule that I wasn't allowed to ask when she agreed to control my orgasms 24/7 - and since that hasn't changed, how can that be my fault? Well in the dream it seemed that argument was null and void, since after all what sort of person (read 'man') would accept that as a tenable part of an agreement?
Hmm...
I don't know why this niggles me so much, only the other day Mistress and I discussed this topic again and she said straight out she is perfectly happy with the way things are and if she changes her mind she will tell me, so why do I find it so difficult to accept? It's doubtless partly because I don't have anything more important to fret about, since life is generally pretty good for us.
I do think that having 'less' penetrative sex means that when we do have it it's more 'special', but I guess the trick is finding a frequency that maintains that 'specialness' without making it feel like we're not doing it at all... which, since I'm not in a position to decide, renders the whole question somewhat redundant from my end.
I guess I just have to accept that Mistress is happy with things as they are until she tells me otherwise. I just hope my subconscious can work with that, because that dream really sucked!
Robert, stop beating yourself up over something which as you rightly say you have no control over, your Mistress must have had her reasons for imposing that rule in the first place. Maybe she only enjoys penetration occasionally, as you've said before she can't cum from penetration so while it's enjoyable clearly for her it isn't the be all end all. If your both satisfied with what you do then that's all that matters isn't it?
ReplyDeleteKay
Sounds like that dream really rattled you; suggest trying to let it fade since Mistress and you have recently discussed penetrative sex and, as you said, the ball's not in your court - so to speak. It does sound like She enjoys the glass dildo with you there "helping" as directed. Seems like you're both happy so let the dream go.
ReplyDeleteI hope Mistress is bouncing back from Her procedure.
On a side note, I enjoyed your end of year charts. Can you post them in a more accessible spot on your page?
You're a lucky man.
D's boy